- The lifestyle I've been living for the last 30 years, I could have been dead a thousand times.
- They say military have the so-called 'secret intelligence' -- this amount of intelligence must be very secret, since I've never seen any intelligent military person, nor I have seen any sense in the bloody stupid wars.
- I'll only retire in the day I should be dead and they have me buried, and some idiot spell over my casket some stupid gospel stuff.
- [on kicking drugs and alcohol for the first time] All I have to say is this. Sobriety F***ing Sucks!
- The only black magic Sabbath ever got into was a box of chocolates.
- My mother was an amateur singer, my father was an amateur drunk.
- Sometimes I think my whole career and life has only been about a bloody Bat!
- I'm a very simple man. You've got to have, like, a computer nowadays to turn the TV on and off...and the nightmare continues.
- A life of booze, drugs and unprotected sex is only going to f*** you up! I mean, look at me!
- I couldn't be a royal. It's like living in a supersonic goldfish bowl.
- (Black) Sabbath were a hippy band. We were into peace.
- Last year I sang for the Queen of England, met the president of the United States, and got an Emmy and a star on The Walk of Fame. And what did I do? I was just being myself.
- Of all the things I've lost I miss my mind the most
- Could be worse . . . I could be Sting.
- Viagra's a great sleeping drug. I take Viagra, and Sharon goes right to sleep.
- LA's not a good place to grow old. It's a Paris Hilton-getting-fucked-up-the-arse kind of town . . . a town full of ambulance chasers.
- I have a genuine love affair with my audience. When I'm on stage they're not privileged to see me. It's a privilege for me to see them.
- Recalling an LSD trip: "There were these horses in a field. They were talking to me."
- The bat thought I was giving him the kiss of life!
- I knew I was in trouble when I couldn't make it offstage quick enough to get whatever variety of shit I was tipping down me. I thought to myself: There are people working in gas stations, and all these menial jobs, to put money aside to see the Ozzfest, and I'm more interested in going back to the hotel, and doing a bag of white powder, or whatever shit it is I'm on.
- It wasn't as if I had a list, I didn't have a resumé saying Tuesday - have a pint, strangle the wife, Wednesday - get bail.
- [on Sharon Osbourne's colon cancer diagnosis] I freaked out. She's the love of my life, and she's also, like, the controller. I couldn't sleep with her for nine months because I was scared of waking up and she'd died in the night.
- People thought ['_The Osbournes_'] was scripted but it wasn't. They'd sit there with five cameras pointing in all directions just for you to slip on a dog turd or something.
- One day, my son and I were arguing and he said: "Do you mind if people laugh with you, or at you?" And I said I didn't give a shit, so long as they were laughing. But really, I was thinking, I wouldn't like to know for a fact that they're laughing at me.
- One night in Hamburg, I painted my face purple, and didn't realise it was indelible. So I had to walk around Hamburg for the next three days with a purple head!
- This has all been such an amazing journey for me. I can vividly remember sitting on the step of my house in Aston, just tripping about what it would be like to be a Beatle. And then, here I am at 58, and I'm at [Elton John]'s party. All these megastars are there, Paul McCartney or whatever. And there's me with them, standing with all these people I used to admire. It's like I've been in the music industry for 30, 40 years, and it's just been incredible really.
- I can honestly say, all the bad things that ever happened to me were directly, directly attributed to drugs and alcohol.
- I got rabies shots for biting the head off a bat but that's OK - the bat had to get Ozzy shots.
- I kept hearing that metal is dead and Ozzy's dead and people that like Ozzy are dead. I have never had an empty seat. I've always sold out, so who's saying it's all over?
- I suppose Americans get a kick out of watching a crazy Brit family like us make complete fools of ourselves every week.
- [quashing longtime rumors] I'm not a Satanist. I don't worship the Devil.
- You gotta be really careful what you bite off. Don't bite off more than you can chew. It's a dangerous world.
- I wish I didn't have to perform 'Iron Man' every night.
- They keep 'em as clean as they possibly could, but prisons are to punish people, so they don't exactly have room service, you know.
- [on "In the Air Tonight" by Phil Collins] That drum fill is the best ever - it still sounds awesome.
- [on WAAF FM in Boston when hearing that the Spice Girls were playing the date between two OzzFest dates] We can all get blow jobs!
- I think Christmas is the biggest load of bollocks ever.
- [on leaving Black Sabbath] I'm not in the band anymore because of musical differences. They were musical. I was different.
- I'm an alcoholic. And the most unnatural thing for an alcoholic is not to drink. So every now and again I'll just go and have a few drinks. But it catches up with you and bites you in the butt, you know?
- I'm sure I'd been exposed to other songs, but I think the first one that had a real effect on me was "She Loves You" by The Beatles. It was just magic - it was like being hit by a bolt of lightning. I even remember where I was and what I was doing. I was walking down the road in Aston one day, with my light blue transistor radio, and this song came on. I thought, 'What the fuck is that?' It changed my life forever, and at that point I knew what I wanted to do with my life. I never knew it would turn out the way it did - it turned out way bigger than my wildest expectations - but I knew that I wanted to be the singer in a band. John Lennon was so great with words. He had an amazing way of turning out ridiculous lyrics but making them sound interesting and clever. Sometimes I like more straightforward lyrics, but at the same time, I'm a fan of lyrics that do a number on my head.
- Every time I did drugs, I would come close to death. It got to the point where I would worry about choking on my own vomit, so I would have to sleep face down. I do it even to this day... I'm very lucky to be alive and realize that. Nearly all the friends I used to get pissed with are now dead. I am living on borrowed time.
- The biggest thing in my life were The Beatles. For four lads who came from the back streets, they showed the way out. When people ask me what made me get into rock and roll, I tell them it was when I first heard The Beatles. It was then that I decided that my life will be in music. Thank G-d for The Beatles.
- No music mogul created Black Sabbath, so no music mogul could tell Black Sabbath what to do. A couple have tried. We simply told them where to shove it. Not many bands can do that nowadays.
- If you want to stand out, don't get a tattoo.
- What are all these bubbles, I'm supposed to be the Prince of Darkness!
- As long as we had a few quid in our pockets and a new car to drive around in and pull a few tarts, we (Black Sabbath) were happy.
- I wasn't keen on "Paranoid" at first. I thought it was a rip-off of Led Zeppelin
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