My 25 worst movies of all time (18/12/10)
After almost one year on imdb and twenty-one years of my life, it is now Christmas time and as a little present or special occasion, I would like to take the time to have a closer look on the worst movies I have ever seen.
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25 titles
- DirectorGore VerbinskiStarsJohnny DeppOrlando BloomKeira KnightleyCaptain Barbossa, Will Turner and Elizabeth Swann must sail off the edge of the map, navigate treachery and betrayal, find Jack Sparrow, and make their final alliances for one last decisive battle.This number 25 in my list of the worst movies ever. It is a completely silly and boring third part of a once interesting and well done movie. Only Johnny Depp is amusing and enjoyable, the rest is really atrocious.
- DirectorSteven SoderberghStarsJulia OrmondBenicio Del ToroOscar IsaacIn 1956, Ernesto 'Che' Guevara and a band of Castro-led Cuban exiles mobilize an army to topple the regime of dictator Fulgencio Batista.Number 24 of my bottom 25 list. I am really interested in history and especially in the life of Ernesto Che Guevara, but this movie only shows some random scenes of his inspiring life and doesn't look beyond the actions of the legend. Random speeches are mixed with random runs through the jungle and random dialogs. This is not profound or interesting at all.
- DirectorRoland EmmerichStarsMatthew BroderickJean RenoMaria PitilloFrench nuclear tests irradiate an iguana into a giant monster that heads off to New York City. The American military must chase the monster across the city to stop it before it reproduces.Most of the Japanese movies are cult movies and I really appreciated to watch them when I was a child. The Americans created an ugly monster without any personality or charm and a boring random story around it. One of a few examples that Hollywood remakes of Asian or European cult flicks are rarely well executed.
- DirectorGeorge LucasStarsHayden ChristensenNatalie PortmanEwan McGregorTen years after initially meeting, Anakin Skywalker shares a forbidden romance with Padmé Amidala, while Obi-Wan Kenobi discovers a secret clone army crafted for the Jedi.I really liked the first (or chronologically said last) three movies and also the first one of the new series but this one here is an atrocious piece of boredom. Because of this infinite piece of crap I never made it to see Episode III as I was tired of spending my time or money on this series. In my opinion, they should have never done the three last ones even if they were a commercial succes because of the name and the fame of the legendary first ones.
- DirectorMcGStarsCameron DiazDrew BarrymoreLucy LiuThree women, detectives with a mysterious boss, retrieve stolen voice-ID software, using martial arts, tech skills, and sex appeal.The series of the 1970's were charming, amusing and very entertaining but this modern Hollywood flick shows us three more or less beautiful women without any charm in a boring random story without any soul. There was even a second part which was even worse than the first one. Another example that remakes often can't reproduce the charm of the original.
- DirectorStephen NorringtonStarsWesley SnipesStephen DorffKris KristoffersonA half-vampire, half-mortal man becomes a protector of the mortal race, while slaying evil vampires.What is this? A gangster rap movie? A flawless action movie? A unsucessful horror movie? And why have there been several sequals? In my opinion, this is one of the most overrated movies of all time.
- DirectorGuy HamiltonStarsSean ConneryJill St. JohnCharles GrayA diamond smuggling investigation leads James Bond to Las Vegas where he uncovers an evil plot involving a rich business tycoon.I am a huge fan of the James Bond series and my favourite one is probably "From Russia with love". But this last official James Bond movie with Sean Connery has a lack of energy, charm and imagination and is without any doubt somehow the filler of the whole series. At least, Connery realized that he couldn't leave with such a deception and made the unofficial "Never say never" about one decade later.
- DirectorBruce A. EvansStarsKevin CostnerDemi MooreWilliam HurtA well-respected businessman is sometimes controlled by his murder and mayhem-loving alter ego.This is a really boring psycho thriller with an interesting main idea but mediocre acting and a too slow paced development.
- DirectorGabriele MuccinoStarsWill SmithThandiwe NewtonJaden SmithA struggling salesman takes custody of his son as he's poised to begin a life-changing professional career.A movie full of bad clichés that shows us nothing new. Will Smith wants to be more and more philosophical, intellectual and ambitious but he is just not credible in his role.
- DirectorLeonard NimoyStarsWilliam ShatnerLeonard NimoyDeForest KelleyAdmiral Kirk and his bridge crew risk their careers stealing the decommissioned U.S.S. Enterprise to return to the restricted Genesis Planet to recover Spock's body.They are searching and searching and searching... and we are sleeping deeply after over two hours of mediocre dialogs and monologues in a lousy spaceship.
- DirectorRoman PolanskiStarsEwan McGregorPierce BrosnanOlivia WilliamsA ghost writer, hired to complete the memoirs of a former British Prime Minister, uncovers secrets that put his own life in jeopardy.A movie by Roman Polanski with famous actors like Ewan McGregor, Pierce Brosnan or the legendary Eli Wallach. That sounds quite good, isn't it? True, but this movie is full of senseless plot holes that erase any suspense or credibility.
- DirectorDenys ArcandStarsMarc LabrècheDiane KrugerSylvie LéonardJean-Marc Leblanc (Labrèche), a desperate civil servant, escapes reality as we know it by imagining himself as the hero in imaginary adventures.A pseudo-intellectual movie about depression, a grey and despaired everyday life with boring and sick characters. A true feel-bad movie and a symphony of sadness.
- DirectorDavid YatesStarsDaniel RadcliffeEmma WatsonRupert GrintWith their warning about Lord Voldemort's return scoffed at, Harry and Dumbledore are targeted by the Wizard authorities as an authoritarian bureaucrat slowly seizes power at Hogwarts.By far the worst part of the series. A lot of interesting parts from the book have been cut off and the dark atmosphere of the novel is replaced by a silly and childish kid's movie. A complete failure.
- DirectorQuentin TarantinoStarsUma ThurmanDavid CarradineDaryl HannahAfter awakening from a four-year coma, a former assassin wreaks vengeance on the team of assassins who betrayed her.Quentin Tarantino wants to honour his Asian idols with this movie but the only thing he does is creating a senseless symphony of violence filled with clichés and plot holes. Bang, slash, boom, rape, kill, die, smash! One would think that this movie was written by a thirteen year old gore and splatter movie fan but not by an adult with a 160 IQ. Shame on you!
- DirectorMartin ScorseseStarsLeonardo DiCaprioMatt DamonJack NicholsonAn undercover cop and a mole in the police attempt to identify each other while infiltrating an Irish gang in South Boston.There are so many brilliant and interesting actors in the movie plus a brilliant director but what came out of this is a slow paced, boring, superficial and confusing flick.
- DirectorPhilippe GagnonStarsGuy JodoinClaude LegaultSylvie MoreauAfter their probe crashes on a newly discovered planet, the crew of the Romano Fafard are introduced to an alien race who informs them that they might know where to find the perfect planet to move the dying human race to.Quebeckers really have a special kind of humour but this one is beyond what I am able to tolerate. Silly and childish jokes meet a nostalgic atmosphere. While the first movie had still a couple of crazy and entertaining ideas, this movie lacks of everything that a good comedy movie needs and leads a legendary series to a weak end.
- DirectorSteven R. MonroeStarsKelly BrookDennis HopperHippolyte GirardotNine strangers, with no apparent connection between them are abducted: drugged, kidnapped and sealed in a house together.This movie is a rather superficial rip off of many other horror movies but that must not be a bad thing. The problem about this movie is that the characters are untouching and superficial and there is no atmosphere at all. In the first half of the movie nothing happens at all and after that everybody dies in a really random and stupid way.
- DirectorStefen FangmeierStarsEd SpeleersSienna GuilloryJeremy IronsIn his homeland of Alagaesia, a farm boy happens upon a dragon's egg -- a discovery that leads him on a predestined journey where he realizes he's the one person who can defend his home against an evil king.The book is really interesting and well written and quite mature for such a young and promising author but the movie is a childish and silly adaption for young children and a terrible piece of kitsch similar to the Hannah Montana world.
- DirectorM. Night ShyamalanStarsSigourney WeaverWilliam HurtJoaquin PhoenixA series of events tests the beliefs of a small isolated countryside village.The previews tried to suggest that this movie would be an interesting horror movie but what Shyamalan gives us is a pseudo-intellectual and superficial social critic piece of boredom with many lenghts and a mediocre acting that destroy the interesting intentions or messages throughout the movie.
- DirectorAlexander WittStarsMilla JovovichSienna GuilloryEric MabiusAlice wakes up in the Raccoon City hospital after the area has been overrun by zombies, and must now make it out of the city before a nuclear bomb is dropped.The first movie really surprised me with a dark and intense atmosphere but this must be one of the worst sequals ever made because this is just ordinary random stuff with a lack of an interesting story, special atmosphere or good acting.
- DirectorMichel HazanaviciusStarsFrançois DamiensJean DujardinKhalid MaadourSecret agent OSS 117 foils Nazis, beds local beauties, and brings peace to the Middle East.Now, let's head straight to my bottom 5. This French flick is a superficial comedy movie with childish, racist, anti-cultural and homphobic jokes that one shouldn't make. The story is totally random and the actors are stupid. I didn't laugh one single time.
- DirectorDavid MoreauXavier PaludStarsJessica AlbaAlessandro NivolaParker PoseyViolinist Sydney Wells was accidentally blinded by her sister Helen when she was five years old. She submits to a cornea transplantation, and while recovering from the operation, she realizes that she is seeing dead people.Another bad Hollywood remake. There is no tension, no horror, no atmosphere and Jessica Alba does a horrible job. One of the worst and most predictable horror movies ever made.
- DirectorRob ZombieStarsSid HaigKaren BlackBill MoseleyTwo young couples traveling across the backwoods of Texas searching for urban legends of murder end up as prisoners of a bizarre and sadistic backwater family of serial killers.This movie wants to be a modern Rocky Horror Picture Show and is a lousy failure with bad jokes, bad ideas, bad acting and an absolutely dumb and random story. Even when you're completely drunk, this is not funny or entertaining.
- DirectorSam RaimiStarsBruce CampbellSarah BerryDan HicksAsh Williams, the lone survivor of an earlier onslaught of flesh-possessing spirits, holes up in a cabin with a group of strangers while the demons continue their attack.This one was introduced to me as a cult movie. Okay, this must be a cult movie because of its unique and really bad special effects, ridicolous and childish ideas, lack of suspense or entertainment and because of its random story and bad acting. The first ten minutes you can still laugh about it but when you realize that this garbage will continue in the same key for seventy long minutes you only have the choice to switch the channel, fall asleep or get heavily drunk. This whole movie is a bad joke.
- DirectorTerrence MalickStarsColin FarrellQ'orianka KilcherChristopher PlummerThe story of the English exploration of Virginia, and of the changing world and loves of Pocahontas.My number one is this overrated movie. I am really interested in history and geography, I am even studying this at university, but this movie with a predictable and ordinary story line just shows us a couple of trees and animals over more than two hours of suffering with a lack of interesting dialogs, a lack of atmosphere, action or tension and a lack of story overall. The two main actors are simply not convincing and their love story is not credible. The extended cut of almost three hours is a killer for any movie night with some friends. Let's watch discovery channel instead, it is much more interesting and entertaining. What a sucker!